Your are, presently this pic, is really good, though I did kinda hoped to see a story with it though. ^^'
Practice does help with writing fanfics but the best way to know if the story is good or not is to write it out first. Is how I've trained myself in writing them... though I'm still a bit rusty in my own writing... >.<' lol Is a little advise, hope it helps.
Also, if a proofreader is what you're lacking I wouldn't mind being one for you if that's the case. Just thought I'd mention it is all.